5542 Spring Steel

[Lord Garth]

DU - HA

If you see this, please, call your cousin.  She's been spiraling after Petey Peg-Pox dumped her after the Centaur Incident.  And yes, everybody knows about the Centaur incident.  Ev-ry-bo-dy.  

She's shacking up with Norman NoThumbs the Gnome so you can find her there.  What's her thing with amputees anyway?  But reach out to her quickly.  Robby the Cobbler's nephew and his freinds are telling everyone they saw her the other day heading to a Goblin party wearing just a chemise.   Goblins.   ::: shakes head ::

Druidy Head,

I called her. She said you're just upset because it's YOUR chemise, and that it looks much better on her. She did say that you had the level of foot hair that really gets her tummy grumblin. I think that's a good thing. I mean, I'm normally upset when my tummy grumbles but when she said it her voice didn't sound the way an upset person's voice sounds. But then she ran off with your chemise to go hang with goblins, so I also understand your level of upset. 

She said something about you having old man toenail, too. Apparently that offset the foot hair thing. 

Whaddya say we just forget the whole thing. She keeps the chemise, you keep your grouchiness about your toenails and loss of chemise, and you send me lots of food to keep me quiet and never mention this again. I believe you have my address.

Mr Halfling,

The only thing I’m upset about is that you would lash out at me simply because I asked you to check on your cousin . You’re aware she is huffing ground Ent bark daily aren’t you ? She is so drugged up she doesn’t know who’s chemise she is wearing but I assure you it isn’t mine. Respectfully I would not be found with your ‘well worn’ cousin other than in her own drug addled dreams .

I had hoped that she would find the help and support she needed from her family but when it comes to class I am reminded that apples don’t fall far from their trees .