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(12-06-2019, 06:01 AM)HabeusCorpus Wrote: NE-BL
I am disappointed by you not following through on your promised trade. Wasted an order and have a potential broken promise on my hands. Do you intend to honor your agreements?
HabeusCorpus
He's busy being chased out of the Diamond Coast and will shortly be chased out of Darkover.
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(12-05-2019, 02:32 PM)Acererak Wrote: (12-05-2019, 05:26 AM)HabeusCorpus Wrote: NE - All
The Necromancer palace is abuzz as the King has summoned his most senior commander in the field (rank of Captain). Quaking in fear the young former farmhand stands before the King in a rather ill fitting and blood stained uniform.
HabeesCorpus - Give me a report ... how goes the Pre-Emptive Defensive campaign against the Gnomes?
Captain LongShot - Not well my lord
HabeusCorpus - What has happened to Level 14 Gnome agent in our prisons?
Captain LongShot - Escaped my lord
HabeusCorpus - We have lost communication with 1st Necromancer for some time. Is there any news about their whereabouts?
Captain LongShot - Wiped out my lord....to a man...including the leadership, several artifacts and a wizard.
HabeusCorpus - This is not good .. did we bloody the enemy at least?
Captain LongShot - No my lord .. they were only phantoms. The enemy sustained no damage.
HabeusCorpus - We marshalled the considerable resources of the empire to lay a little surprise for our Gnome friends with a Fortress in his backyard. Did our move taken right from the works of Sun Tzu surprise the unsuspecting Gnome? "Self indulgent chuckles from the King"
Captain LongShot - No my lord. Unfortunately the Fortress was quickly taken by the Gnome army...they currently occupy our Fortress. We held it for one turn only my lord.
HabeusCorpus- I am sure we made them pay for it in blood though correct?
Captain LongShot - No my lord. Unfortunately between their magic and massed armies they were able to seize the fortress with very little bloodshed. Reports suggest only 6.77% attrition but even this was more than recouped by the long list of promotions that followed the battle.
HabeusCorpus - (Getting noticeably angrier) Well what the happened to our Wizards ... why are they not stepping up to defend the realm?
Captain Longshot - Several have been assassinated and one died in combat my Lord.
HabeusCorpus - Security?
Captain Longshot - Weak my lord. The Gnome agents came and went like a shadow in the night.
HabeusCorpus - I am scared to ask ... all reports from the 5th Necromancer (pride of the empire) have ceased. Is there any news.
Captain Longshot - I am afraid it is not good my lord. They were caught out of position by the first Gnome army. It was horrible my lord. (Quiver in the Capitain's voice). Fireballs, earthquakes and tornadoes swept the battlefield. There were reports of body parts landing as far afield as Stormgate. Goblins stormed the field and caused havoc and chaos everywhere. As you know our Lord Commander previously died on the battlefield storming the Gnome capital (which they retook) so poor leadership added to the route. Everyone was lost my Lord.
HabeusCorpus - Son...the 5th Necromancer was filled with our nation's finest, including Knights of the Styx. 19 brigades in all. Surely we made the Gnomes pay.
Captain Longshot - Unfortunately no my lord. The Gnomes fight like they are possessed and field some of the most powerful wizards Maelstrom has seen. Losses were negligible at 8.1%. We had men from a nearby village observing the battlefield and reported that the line up of Gnome soldiers and leaders receiving medals and promotions was never ending and they took hours to cycle through. My eyes bled reading the reports my lord. I must say, my lord, that at present the 1st Gnome army is significantly stronger then when we began our defensive campaign.
HabeusCorpus - And our gains?
Captain Longshot - Two villages my lord. We are sure the Gnomes go hungry and that many children are left hungry suckling on the wasted and withered bossums of their mother. We can hold our heads high that we have made the enemy pay dearly.
Captain Longshot's head abruptly leaves his neck as Habeus's sword cuts through the air.
Pacing the throne room he yells: "This is a debacle, this is humiliating. There are people across the lands with popcorn in their hands waiting for a "show" to start. It isn't a war movie, it isn't an action movie, it isn't even a drama ... it is the lowest of the low ... it is a romantic comedy at best. There are already whispers in the street about the title ... "Two Good Friends and a very short, very fat, white guy"
I need a Mentor ... I need a Mentor now! Send messengers to all the kingdoms across the land. Now!
Wait!!
Send a messenger to everyone BUT Tobias. Even the thought of that pompous self absorbed nitwit providing me with "advice" makes me want to vomit. Besides, he is probably too busy leading a village parade somewhere while his empire is starved and blasted to death with meteor strikes.
The sounds of anguish and frustration emanate throughout the palace. (PI) I'll be happy to help you out in your next game if you like and I can.
the best way to better yourself is to give back to the community. Elf boy gave me his baron this turn, and I am sure he feels better as a result. Try a unilateral trade with the sorceror kingdom, send some gold, see if you are bettered.
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(12-06-2019, 02:18 PM)unclemike Wrote: (12-06-2019, 12:51 PM)HabeusCorpus Wrote: NE - GN
Peace? We should stop this senseless bloodshed while the AM run away with this game. We should "bury the hatchet" and not just in my head. As an added inducement, I will call you Uncle with a capital U for the rest of the game.
HabeusCorpus
GN - NE
Jeez, your emissary sure does talk a lot! And I thought my gnomish wife would never stop her yapping...
Fine, I'll leave you alone for a while but it can't be for a lengthy period (see original post of no non-aggression pacts for this particular game: http://www.kingdomsofarcania.net/forum/s...7#pid63547).
But this temporary truce only applies to your holdings in Krynn, not elsewhere. Now, you may carry on regarding how great and wonderful smelling the gnomish king is while visiting your region.
NE-GN
Unclemike (emphasis on the first two syllables) ... I appreciate your very kind offer. My request for a truce and offer to call you Uncle going forward was done very much tongue in cheek but your offer is appreciated. You have well earned your victory dance and I encourage you to do whatever action offers you the best opportunity to win this game. If that is continuing to dominate me (picture a large kid taking candy from a baby) then so be it ... if it is having a friendly, subservient but not quite grovelling friendly neighbor then great.
If you destroy the army you are on this turn I will not have a single soldier left to my name - my head still spins at the speed of which my "empire" has been dismantled. The mothers of the sons that are about to be drafted into the soon to be appearing Necromancer brigades are already crying and mourning their certain impending death.
My only request is that you let me know which direction you would like to go - a new friendly neighbor or neighborhood candy stealing bully. Choice is yours. Kindest regards Uncle.
HabeusCorpus
Disclaimer: There was no perfume on this note.
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(12-07-2019, 11:48 AM)uncledarkseid Wrote: (12-05-2019, 02:32 PM)Acererak Wrote: (PI) I'll be happy to help you out in your next game if you like and I can.
the best way to better yourself is to give back to the community. Elf boy gave me his baron this turn, and I am sure he feels better as a result. Try a unilateral trade with the sorceror kingdom, send some gold, see if you are bettered.
I prefer "Thoughts and Prayers".
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SO-all
council seat is for sale, 100,000 for those rich in food
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(12-06-2019, 06:01 AM)HabeusCorpus Wrote: NE-BL
I am disappointed by you not following through on your promised trade. Wasted an order and have a potential broken promise on my hands. Do you intend to honor your agreements?
HabeusCorpus Sorry, life is kind of whacked right now. I'll put the order in this turn.
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Sparklepants to DarkLizard,
Aren't you tired of beating your troops against our domes? It must be tiring and, frankly, a little embarrassing. Care to guess how effective you are with your military this turn? Hint: it'll be about the same.
Feel free to hang around. If you leave, I'll just chase you at this point.
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(12-11-2019, 11:16 PM)DuPont Wrote: (12-06-2019, 06:01 AM)HabeusCorpus Wrote: NE-BL
I am disappointed by you not following through on your promised trade. Wasted an order and have a potential broken promise on my hands. Do you intend to honor your agreements?
HabeusCorpus Sorry, life is kind of whacked right now. I'll put the order in this turn.
Dupont,
Thank you for honoring the agreement. Unfortunately I didn't see this until now and missed the order. I can put the trade in this turn ... please confirm.
HabeusCorpus
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NE-ALL
I have 60K food to trade for $40K Gold - anyone interested?
HabeusCorpus
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NE-BL
I appreciate the attempted trade but we are a "very big" and "very powerful" kingdom with many demands on our orders and king each month. Can you please communicate the trade to me so I can lock it in on my side ... I already wasted an order once so would like to put the order in again when I know that you can reciprocate.
Please let me know.
HabeusCorpus
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